Is it hard to remove stretch marks?

I’ve just spent an afternoon on the golf course away from all the incessant chatter about stretch marks, stretch mark removal and the likes that my daughter and wife seem obsessed with. When I mention my afternoon, my wife retorts that it’s only a game and that she has something serious to talk to me about after our evening meal.

This is worrying because the kitchen table is still covered with pamphlets about this and that regarding various stretch mark products, which she and my daughter have spent a good part of the perusing. I really did think the table might be laid for my dinner by now.

As I’m fairly house trained, I begin to clear the table, a pamphlet falls on the floor exclaiming how stretch marks are unattractive, and embarrassing and can destroy your confidence. That they affect a woman’s choice in clothes and the way they show their bodies. It such a great thing to be a man isn’t it. Embarrassing for me well that’s a “topping”, for those with no knowledge of this term, that’s when you strike your golf ball on the head, instead of in the middle and sending it scuffling ignominiously just a few yards ahead.

This pamphlet claims a cure is possible for stretch marks and that you can regain your self-confidence. This product guarantees visible results in a matter of few short weeks. Wow, pondering, but what will they find to talk about when they’ll find out how to get rid of stretch marks. My wife still absorbed in removing an eye from a potato appears not to notice my interest and so I continue reading.

Apparently this skin treatment directly changes the look of the tone and texture and contains a proprietary compound for firming the skin. The skin becomes more elastic and hydrates. It has proven to be ninety three percent effective in clinical trials.

Oh boy, I am beginning to visualise a peaceful life, can this be possible, after so many years of being haunted by my wife and her stretch marks and now my daughter. Oh and then there’s the latest pregnancy and the “what if I get more stretch marks?”

Well low and behold the next pamphlet contains information on how to prevent stretch marks. This product is used twice a day. I firmly believe its time these two stopped all the talking about these products and start trying them out. “Is the table ready yet dear” comes the voice from the kitchen. Startled out of my reverie, I hurriedly pack everything away and shout “yes dear”. My wife enters the room carrying two plates of food. Oh yes, the way to a mans heart is through his stomach, no doubt about this.

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